June 20, 2009
Women of Color and Rape Culture
Delux-Vivens and She Who Has Hope each have really excellent posts talking about how the experiences of Women of Color are all too frequently left out of discussions of rape. Please read both; they're important.
How to be "That Guy," a concrete example
Since I linked to Cereta's post on Rape and Men a few days ago, I've been thinking a lot about the topic and talking to Paul about it as well, talking about ways that guys who genuinely want to make a positive difference can politely step in when they see an uncomfortable situation.
It got me to thinking about something that happened to me while some friends and I were hitchhiking across Ireland some years ago. Two of my male friends and I were in Dublin, at a popular tourist bar. There was a big, happy, high-energy session going on in the center of the pub; I was on one side of the session and my friends were on the other. I was snugged in underneath one of those elbow-height bar tables with my sketchbook open drawing the sessioneers, and my friends were seated at a table drinking beer.
All of a sudden, this seriously drunk guy loomed over me, and started hassling me. I was polite and tried to fend him off as best I could, but he was really, really drunk and kept insisting that I draw him instead of the sessioneers. He was so drunk that after about five minutes of me trying to politely dismiss him, he actually leaned over and goobered a mouthful of vomit-smelling drool on my arm. (I was wearing a windbreaker, but still.)
That's when I looked over at my friends. They were on their feet, palms flat on the table, making direct eye contact with me. Their looks both said "All you have to do is nod your head and we will flip over tables and chairs and elbow playing musicians out of the way to get to you and make sure you're safe."
I cannot tell you how much that meant to me. It meant that my buddies had my back -- but it also meant that they were willing to let me make the call whether I wanted them to get involved.
I raised one hand, palm-out, in acknowledgement, inclining my head: "I've got this, it's okay." They sat back down, but kept their eyes on me as I moved to a safer place across the room and away from Drunkie*. They never stopped checking on me as long as we were separated.
So there, if you want a concrete example of How To Intervene Well, that's mine. It helped that we were travelling buddies in a strange city and had to keep tabs on one another; it helped that I was sober, it helped that the crowd was friendly -- strangers handed me kleenex from purses to help me clean off my arm -- but none of these things was as important as the fact that my friends had my back, and respected my judgement enough to allow me to decide whether or not I needed rescuing.
A scenario like this is definitely easier if you know the other person, but I still strongly advocate for this type of backing-each-other-up. If you see someone you think may be in trouble socially, even across a crowded room, make eye contact with them. Incline your head, change your posture to indicate that you're at the ready if they need you, all while telegraphing "Are you all right? Do you need me to say something?" Give them the chance to accept or decline. That can make all the difference, just knowing there's someone else who notices the situation.
Thank heaven, I am one of those few lucky women who have never been assaulted or raped or physically threatened, so I am speaking from a place of privilege, and speaking from another place of privilege as a middle-class white woman. In comparison to the hundreds of other stories on Cereta's post, mine is laughably minor -- but I do know how much it means to know you have backup in an uncomfortable situation.
*Ten minutes after I got drooled on, Drunkie started clapping along with the session, and literally blundered into the middle of it. The uillean piper, kit still attached, stood up, grabbed Drunkie by the shoulders and shoved him backward into the crowd, then called the manager to have him ejected.
Shoutout for Steve Leiber and Sara Ryan
Steve Leiber has some incredibly good news lately... he and Jeff Parker's long-awaited spelunking comic (yep, a comic about cave exploration and rescue) is here:
It's soliciting in Diamond's July PREVIEWS to ship in September, so head on down to your LCS and pre-order yours today!
His other good news involves a movie based on a graphic novel he illustrated a while back called Whiteout. After several delays, it looks like it may be nearing theatrical release. The book is wonderful -- can't speak for the movie yet because the movie execs yanked the trailer before I could watch it. But you're going to need to read the book before you see the movie, right? right?
See, there's a reason why I'm telling you to buy Steve's books. It's because in addition to his really good news, he also had some stupendous bad news today:
My wife and I were just burgled. They stole our laptops, so we have no computers at home anymore, and we've got several days ahead of us of running around dealing with police, insurance, checking to make sure backups work, etc. This means that all the time at home I'd planned to spend doing promotion is gone, as are the machines I'd planned to it with.Lots of folks have asked "what can I do to help?" The answer, if you have a comics audience, is blog or tweet something about the book. Send them to the site, or this specific post, or just tell them that Parker and I have a new Image book coming out. Your RTs and message board notes can make a big difference.
This sucks extra bad because Steve and his wife Sara Ryan are two of the nicest, kindest people you could ask to know. Sara's also a writer and has some really wonderful books out. So you should go and buy her books, too.
Hope your luck turns back to all-good soon, Steve and Sara!
June 16, 2009
I wore green today.
To stand in solidarity with the Iranian election protesters.
Woodrow Hill has two excellent posts here and here about why it's important to blog about the protests.
Andrew Sullivan's blog has frequent updates from insider sources, and Twazzup.com has up-to-the-second tweets from Iranians at the scene as well as people all over the world.
This is history in the making, and for possibly the first time ever, the mainstream media is solidly behind the curve. Bloggers and Twitterers are taking up the slack, giving eyewitness accounts, flashmobbing help to the injured. This is amazing, this is history, this is full-out rebellion against fascism, and the internet is the voice of the revolution.
Take note: The protesters in Tehran are setting an unbelievable example of bravery, and they deserve our support however we can lend it.
June 12, 2009
Kids Read Comics -- THIS WEEKEND!
Man, I've been really lax about mentioning my summer engagements this year.
The most exciting one, by a long shot, is coming up this very weekend! It's called Kids Read Comics! and it's brought to you by Dan Mishkin and Dan and Katie Merritt of Green Brain Comics, and it's being held in my home-town of Chelsea.
Paul and I will be there all day this Saturday, and we'll be joined by such awesome comics all-stars as Jim Ottaviani, Michelangelo Ciccerone, Tara Tallan, Mark Crilley, Fred Gallagher and Katie Cook and many many more!
There's programming all day Friday and Saturday, and the event is free to the public, so if you're anywhere in the Chelsea, Michigan this weekend, come on by!
June 10, 2009
Backing each other up
Last week, LJ user Cereta posted this essay: On Rape and Men. I thought it was very good, and reminded me that I should've blogged about these two projects a long time ago:
Open Source Women Back Each Other Up Project (and Gentleman's Auxiliary) (see also: here and here)
While I'm reasonably good at standing up for myself, there have been many times when I've been grateful for the intervention of a friend in an uncomfortable situation. Exercise your best judgment, of course -- don't go around white knighting where it's unnecessary -- but most times when it looks like the other person could use your help? They probably could.
If comics are going to live ... we have to save them.
Captain Blood and the Peril of Indie Comics!
h/t to Dirk Deppey at iJournalista!
Mes Bottines Souriantes
So I wanted some fun, steamy boots to wear to conventions this year, and I decided I finally wanted a pair of heels. I scored a pair of Frye Villagers on eBay for about $20 (!) and then steamed them up more by sewing these buttons over each of the eyelets. I wanted to get the effect of this kind of boot, without paying $400.
So I've got them on, and I'm wearing them around the house to break them in, and holy crap three-and-a-half-inch heels are tall. Wow. I mean, it's not like I'm stumbling around, I can handle them just fine, but man, you wear flats all the time and you just forget. I wonder if I'll be brave enough to wear them all day Saturday at Wizard World. We shall see.
June 9, 2009
Give me your answer, do
I'm working my way through Thoughtcrime Experiments, and my favorite story so far is Daisy, though I've liked all of them that I've read. Have a look!
Rotten little jerks
While I was away this weekend, the birds ate every single one of my ripe cherries. Every. Single. One.
June 4, 2009
It's that time of year again: Jane's Mom's Pottery Sale
Saturday June 6, 2009
10 am - 4 pm
609 West Middle Street
Chelsea, Michigan
(corner of West Middle & Wilkinson Streets)
Neighborhood Potters:
Polly Bradburn
Judy Irwin
Thaya Rowe
g a r d e n p o t s • b o w l s • v a s e s • m u g s